When most people hear about counselling they wonder
“What’s wrong with the people getting counselling?”,
“What mental illness do they have?”,
“They must be depressed”!
And when the gossip inducing topic of premarital counselling pops up
” They can’t get married if they are getting counselling already”
“Bob MUST have been at it again…. Cheating on Julie, OH NO!... he doesn’t deserve such a lovely girl”
#!*!~*#!*!#!* Kaboooom! #!*!~*#!*!#!*
Let’s try really hard to snap out of the soap opera doom and gloom mindset and consider that maybe life for a couple needing premarital counselling is good but the pressure of the big day ahead is challenging or a long term relationship needs a few minor tweaks to bring back the excitement.
Premarital Advice – Reignite Your hobbies With Therapy.
If you’ve been in a relationship for a long time you’ll know what it’s like to end up arguing over a pair of dirty socks left on the bathroom floor or gradually spending less time on your favourite hobbies because your partner doesn’t approve of your nightly trainspotting sessions.
Premarital counselling can help you to manage your relationship better so that you can have more fun and spend more time on your favourite hobbies. Just make sure they don’t include Hikaru dorodango or anything too weird, whatever that might be.
Relationships are always a work in progress
Relationships are known to just happen, love at first sight a few dates, money spent on the compulsory flowers, chocolate and perfume and suddenly your Facebook status changes to in a relationship.
Togetherness isn’t planned but neither is your favourite hobby or that unexpected first child. Many things in your life happen suddenly and without preparation but when they do we natural work on learning, improving and creating some kind of stability. We brainstorm, express feelings and listen to advice from others.
In relationships it is easy to just go with the flow. Plans are made but often it is difficult to find a way to achieve them when two lives blend together and there has to be some give and take once months and years have passed and that freshness descends into a slightly habitual and repetitive connection between two people.
Some premarital counselling or advice is a step towards building a successful and fun relationship. Let the relationship be an enjoyable and accepted continual work in progress rather than a stalemate that’s difficult to enjoy.
We have all seen the beautifully dressed bride to be left at the alter while the fiancee hops on a transatlantic flight never to be seen again. Whether this is the pre-wedding nerves or a lack of actual desire to go ahead with the wedding, having shared your feelings honestly and openly beforehand can save a lot of embarrassment and tears for all involved.
But, if you are getting paid to marry or being FoRcEd by your parents to marry an Egyptian prince go ahead anyway. Money ALWAYS beats love and happiness and marrying a polar opposite complete stranger who you despise is ALWAYS fun for someone involved.